Inspiration from "See No Stranger"

Dianne Evans, Siri Karm Singh Khalsa, Carl Chudy, and Jess Mcguire with Valarie Kaur (center), author of See No Stranger. Lisa Paige, Keith, and Jean Morrisey, who also came to the author event, could not stay for the picture taking.

The Metrowest Interfaith Community offered a three-part opportunity to come together and study the work of Valarie Kaur, See No Stranger. It was an inspirational time that surprisingly allowed us to meet her at the end of the book discussion and to hear her speak of the times we live, not in the darkness of the tomb, but the darkness of the womb!

This is an outline of the book that shows a revolutionary love that connects us to others, our opponents and ourselves.

One of the hardest things we can do as humans is to love our enemies past the harm and hurt they have caused.  Valarie Kaur , author, and member of the Sikh faith has given us a book that can help us to do this work and a compass that lays out the steps in doing this.
 
In See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love, Kaur provides us with a book that is part memoir and part how-to manual on how to practice what she describes as “revolutionary love”. She defines revolutionary love as the active decisions humans make to wonder about others, our opponents, and ourselves. This act of wonder, she says, will help make the world a better place. Failing to wonder ultimately leads to violence against people who we consider as the other.
 
Valerie offers us a road map compass that helps us to reach new layers of dialogue. And this allows us to see beyond the hurt to a new level of forgiveness and compassion. Many members of the Sikh community were targeted in the days immediately following the attacks of 9/11.  In the book, Kaur talks about the loss of her uncle, a member of the Sikh community.  He was killed the day after 9/11.  Why? Maybe because they looked different, maybe because they wore turbans, maybe because some people are racist, ignorant, or maybe even afraid. She writes about how the whole community came together to offer their prayers, sympathy, and support.
 
She also writes in detail about the 2012 Oak Creek Massacre in Wisconsin. A lone gunman brutally attacked a Sikh Temple. Six people were killed, and 4 others severely injured. The motive for this was apparently white supremacy.  Again, people from other religious communities, people from the area, from around the state and around the country came together to offer prayer and support.
 
Ms. Kaur also talks frankly about the verbal, emotional, and sexual abuse that was inflicted upon her by some members of her family, a cousin, and a long-term fiancé. Despite all the hurt and harm, she is now a strong, whole, and loving person.
 
In her book she challenges us ” to see no strangers by telling us to wonder about others, to grieve our hurts and fight through them.  She challenges us to tend our wounds and the wounds of our opponents by paying attention to our rage, by listening and by reimaging what these relationships and the world might be. 
 
And then she challenges us to love ourselves. In order to love ourselves, we must learn how to breathe. Breathing is life-giving and creates space in our lives to think and see differently. Then we must learn to push through our grief, rage, and trauma. Having pushed through, we can find and transition to healing, forgiveness and even reconciliation”.
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A few weeks ago, our Metrowest Interfaith group was invited to a local Sikh Gurdwara to attend their worship service and participate in their Langar, a free community meal that is an important part of living out their faith.  The meal is prepared and served by volunteers in the spirit of equality and hospitality.  It was an amazing experience to witness their community and faith in action.
 
Although I couldn’t understand all of the worship service; the music, movements, singing, chanting, and prayers were beautiful. The service evoked feelings of warmth, peace and well-being.  One of the prayers was as follows:
 
“I have forgotten my envy of others Since I found my sacred company.
I see no enemy. I see no strangers.  All of us belong to each other.
What the divine does, I accept as good.  I have received this wisdom from the holy.
The One pervades all.  Gazing upon the One, beholding the One, Nanak blossoms forth in happiness.”
                                             --Sri Guru Granth, Raag Kanarra
 
There are 3 main beliefs of Sikhism:  Remember God’s name with every breath; Work and earn by the sweat of the brow, live a family way of life and practice truthfulness and honesty in all dealings; and to share and live as an inspiration and support to the whole Community. 
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As a person deeply interested in interfaith dialogue and relationships,  the Sikh community has given me tools to make better changes in my life and to look beyond negativity and use Valerie’s compass as a way to make better connections and to look at and hear each other’s stories without judgement, and to make lasting systemic changes.

Jess McGuire & Dianne Evans